Gnarly Green Gobbos - "Cheerleaders"

I've been torn about what to paint next - brand new teams? old teams I never painted? touching up old teams that were painted, but need fixing or that I have a few extra minis I can finish up to add to the teams!? I've been doing a bit of all three and getting nowhere... So I've tried to focus on touching up the Gnarly Green Gobbos and painting (or RE-painting) a few extra minis I have that I can use with the team. 

The first I've finished up are a trio of female goblins that I'm using as cheerleaders. 

Goblin "Cheerleaders" 

These were the original cheerleaders I had for the team, when I was playing 35 years ago. They are old, early 80's, pre-slotta Citadel miniatures. I think they came in a pack called Goblin (or Orc?) Villagers. Some years ago I stripped the original paint off and planned to repaint them as orc/goblin villagers or camp followers... but I never really got around to that... So now they're back to being Goblin "Cheerleaders". 

They kind of look thoroughly unimpressed. I have two stories that could explain this... 

First they're the girlfriends of players on the team and are entirely unimpressed with their shenanigans and know that after the game, should they survive, their boyfriends all going to be going out and drinking with their friends and getting rowdy and in no way be able to come home and help out with the family or pay any attention to their girlfriends... 

The second, and, I think more likely, is that if we go with the idea that all fantasy orc/goblinoids are asexual/non-binary fungoids that grow from spores... These are just regular goblins dressed up in drag and pressed into service as "cheerleaders" and thus they are grumpy because they don't get to play and feel like they're being made fools of, dressed up like the cheerleaders of the other non-fungoid, humanoid races...? 

Wasn't even sure if there was a game benefit to having Cheerleaders, just felt I needed to get these done first... because I think they are hilarious. 

It turns out you can hire up to six cheerleaders for 10,000 gold each (or temp agency cheerleaders for 5000gold?). As far as I can tell the only game effect they have is give you a +1 to the cheering fans roll, when the Cheering Fans Kick Off Event happens (a result of 6 on the 2d6 Kick-Off Event roll), which, if won, you count as having on additional offensive assist on the first Block Action performed in your next turn...? 

Is it worth it...? for a shot at a bonus on ONE Block Action, about 14% of the time a kick-off happens...? I don't know... I have my doubts... I'm probably going to hire them anyway! 

Blood Bowl - Elf Team

I have a plastic Elf Blood Bowl team that came with Dungeon Bowl (1989) - like the orcs and human plastic teams that came in the second edition core box (1988), they are mono-pose and you could only tell which position they played by the colour-coded bases. I thought I should FINALLY get around to painting these minis that I've had squirrelled away for over three decades! 

I'd originally started painting them in a dark green uniform - ALL with blond hair - But I'm just going to prime them black and start over. I was thinking I might just paint these up as an existing team, just so I don't have to think about it too much... Elves probably aren't going to be my go-to team, these will strictly be loaners (or... maybe Amanda will play them!?).

So I was considering the classic Elfhiem Eagles... but then... WHICH version of their colour scheme!? 

(Image ©2026 Games Workshop, used here entirely without their permission for the purposes of review)

The current ones are in an orange and purple uniform and... not going to lie, one of my favourite colour combinations...

(Image ©1989 Games Workshop, used here entirely without their permission for the purposes of review)

This is as they were also depicted in the Blood Bowl (Second Edition - 1988) Star Players book (which came out in 1989)

BUT.... on the cover of the Blood Bowl (Second Edition - 1988) rule book... 

(Image ©1988 Games Workshop, used here entirely without their permission for the purposes of review)

They are depicted in PINK - with white pads and gloves... and some red and yellow accents! And... I kind of LOVE that... 

I don't know about that all blond hair, though... I may have do deviate from that a bit... or not... we shall see! 

In addition to the plastic mono-pose minis, I also have a few metal ones, which I will also do in... whichever scheme I decide upon! They can be the captain and alternates or whatever... 

Blood Bowl – Third Season Edition!

So... I did a thing... 

I just kind of happened to be in the vicinity of Dragon's Den Games yesterday afternoon while running errands, and... 

This just kind of ended up in my bicycle bag... 

I had a lot of fun playing Blood Bowl last week with Vera and it brought back a LOT of fond memories of playing Blood Bowl Second Edition back in the late 80s/Early 90s.... And the game seems to be taking off here and I already HAVE teams - including a few that still need to be painted - that have been in the PILE OF OPPORTUNITY since the 80s/90s!!? 

So I'd looked into just basics I'd need to play the game - the rule book... and a pitch to play on... and the set of tokens... and a set of dice... and all that added up to the same price as the new edition's core box, which was still available at my FLGS (Dragon's Den Games!) which includes the rule book... and a pitch to play on... and the set of tokens... and TWO sets of dice... and TWO COMPLETE TEAMS!? 

It is bonkers how much better a deal the core boxes are!?

What have I gotten myself into... 

Some of the aforementioned minis I still have from the 80s/90s... There are complete Dwarf and Elf teams there. The skaven are painted, but I really need to touch up the bases. In fact, MOST of the teams could do with a bit of touching up, lots of paint chipped off from many, MANY hours of use back in the day (and probably rough storage and many, many moves had a bit to do with their current state!)

Some of the paint jobs aren't great and there is a temptation to strip and repaint the lot of them... but they have... "character" and nostalgia is holding me back from just stripping them all... 

Also the basing was pretty sloppy... that I MIGHT redo! I'm not really sure what size to put them on, though... Currently anything that isn't HUGE goes on a 32mm base. But I worry that putting some of these on a 32mm base will just emphasize how much smaller they are that the current minis, and so I'm kind of leaning towards not rebasing - or rebasing onto new 25mm bases (or maybe 28mm bases...?) 

While I have enough teams to host a small tournament, there are a couple of new teams I wouldn't mind picking up - the Halflings and the Nurgle team - just because the miniatures look like they'd be really fun to paint. I am absolutely NOT buying EITHER until I have painted all the stuff I have and have played a few games with them!! 

Blood Bowl - Gnarly Green Guys versus Shitsberg Stealers

Vera was back in town this week and suggested we play games! I feel like we haven't played games in MONTHS. She suggested trying out the new version of Blood Bowl (Third Season Edition - 2025). I played a LOT of Blood Bowl (Second Edition) back in the late 80s. Like a LOT!!! It's probably one of my most played games ever! I have not played it in the last 35 years, however! 

My team - the Gnarly Green Guys! 

#1 Hotlicks Wobblespot (Goblin Lineman) 

#3 Dirk Blood (Goblin Lineman) 

Also #3 (apparently!?) Norg (Troll) - I mean who's going to argue with a troll if it shows up and is wearing the same number as one of your other players...? 

#4 Leon Cankersore (Goblin Lineman) 

#7 Bill S. Pestmain (Goblin Lineman) 

#10 Ted "Wildboar" Grogan (Goblin Lineman) 

#15 Fungusface (Goblin Looney - with Chainsaw) 

#16 S. Maulfart (Goblin Lineman) 

#28 Dagadyr (Troll) 

#48 Bop (Goblin Pogoer) 

#67 Chaz Goldensnott (Goblin Hooligan) 

#69 Jean Klean (Goblin  Fanatic - with Ball and Chain ) 

Vera's team - the Shitsberg Stealers. 

I kicked off in the first half... 

Before the ball even landed on the far side of the pitch, Greg the Shitsberg Stealers troll started hammering on #3 Norg the Troll stunning him! 

A trio of Black Orcs from the Shitsberg Stealers ganged up on The Gnarly Green Guys other Troll, #28 Dasgdyr! 

Dasgdyr sprang back up and with the aid of #69 - the ball and chain fanatic - Jean Klean - took down one of the gargantuan Orcs. Bill S. Pestmaim ran into to foul the downed Orc! 

A serious melee ensued mid-field. 

#15 Fungusface - the Goblin Looney - was flailing his Chainsaw all over the place, meanwhile a pair of goblins from the Shitberg Stealers, snuck around the side and made a run for the end zone! 

#28 Dagadyr cut the little goober off and knocked him into the dirt, the ball scattered into the crowd... 

... who threw it out into the middle of the pitch! 

#48 Bop - the Goblin Pogoer - went after the ball... 

... and ended up injured and recovering in the dugout for his troubles. 

#69 Jean Klean - the Goblin Fanatic - drove one of the Shitsberg Stealers Orcs clear off the field with his spinning Ball and Chain ! 

One of the other goblins from the Shitsberg Stealers snatched up the ball and sprinted for the end zone, scoring the first touchdown of the game!! 

Furious and angry, the Gnarly Green Guys just kept beating on the Stealers... 

#28 Dagadyr - one of the Gnarly Green Guys trolls kicked one of the Shitsberg Stealers orcs while they were down and was thrown out of the game for fouling! 

(Whoopsie! Lesson learned! Don't use the big guys for fouling!!!) 

#7 Bill S. Pestmain - Goblin Lineman for the Gnarly Green Guys - grabbed the Stealers kick and quickly passed it to  #48 Bop - the Goblin Pogoer! 

The Goblin Pogoer bounded up the field with the rest of the team trying to clear the way! 

The Goblin Pogoer bounced right over the Stealers goblin lineman! 

The ball was passed off the the Gnarly Green Guys captain, #1 Hotlicks Wobblespot, who ran it in the the goal, tying up the game just as the squigpipes sounded to mark the end of the first half of the game!! 

The Shitsberg Stealers kicked off to the Gnarly Green Guys to start the second half of the game! 

Once again, it was the Gnarly Green Guys' Pogoer, #48 Bop, that took the ball up the field. bouncing past, and OVER, the Shitsberg Stealers defensive line. 

and scored the Gnarly Green Guys second goal, putting them in the lead!! 

The Gnarly Green Guys, roared with delight... and it was now the Shitsberg Stealers that were roaring with frustration and anguish... 

Recieving the next kick-off the Shitsberg Stealers' goblins tore up the field with reckless abandon, and only to be brought down right at the scoring line by the Gnarly Green Guys! 

The Gnarly Green Guys recoved the ball and passed it to their pogoer who, once again, bounded up the field like the mad bastard that he is... but did not make it to the Stealers line before the Squigpipes sounded!!

Vera having a good laugh at the absolute madness of it all! 

we realized after the game, I probably should not have been using both the Fanatic and the Looney throughout the game - as BOTH had illicit weapons that would have required bribing the refs... they accounted for the majority of the Stealers injuries - which included THREE of the orcs AND their TROLL!! 

It was fun to revisit the game after so many decades. Blood Bowl (Second Edition) was probably one of my MOST PLAYED games EVER!! I played SO MUCH of it back in high school. I personally ran two or three leagues, and played in another league or two... plus so many "exhibition matches" between leagues and teaching the game to people at the Wizard's Corner (Saskatoon's first game store - which I'd worked at through high school). I was playing multiple games a few nights a week and more on the weekends... for months... 

It's nice to see how it's evolved... but in many ways is still the same. It's nice that I could, in theory, still play with all the teams I had (or... at least... most of them). 

(I did do some accounting, though, and realized that picking up a pitch and the rules and a set of the dice and tokens to play with current players... would end up costing exactly the same as buying a starter box... which includes all those things - PLUS TWO TEAMS!? - and a SECOND set of the dice!) 

Am I going to buy in and start playing again...? I don't know... I've been wanting to repair and touch-up the old miniatures for ages. There's a part of me that would like to strip and completely repaint and rebase a lot of them... but I also kind of love the old paint jobs and feel a lot of nostalgia for those teams that played so many games back in the day... I'll probably leave them as they are (but maybe clean them up a bit!) 

Kreuger’s Unvalids

It all started with a plucky little Blood Bowl team called the Gnarly Green Gobbos.

They sucked.

I mean, like, they REEEAAAAALLY sucked.

Like, worse than Bad News Bears, kind of sucked.

I swear, they lost every damned game they ever played, and every single game at least half the team ended up either seriously injured or KILLED!



Part way through their first season, the Team Captain, Hotlicks Wobblespot, suggested to a couple of the surviving originals (Bill S. Pestmain and Ted “Wild Boar” Grogan) changing their name to Gnarly Green GUYS and recruit some Bigger, Meaner, GREENER, muscle – trolls and orcs.



And so, the team was expanded.

Their win/loss record didn’t change much… but the utter slaughter and carnage was… well... a little less one-sided!

(one wonders if the new recruits actually even understood the actual purpose of the “game”…. Still, "fun" was had, and that's all that matters, right?)



Among those new recruits was a blocker by the name of Uruk Kreuger. Kreuger went on to become a Star Player and crushed a good many skulls in his time….



Uruk Kreuger and Hotlicks Wobblespot became best of friends... or... at least... the closest thing to "friends" greenies can possibly be... "inseparable partners in all manners of violence"might be a better description...?



Until one fateful day when he had an unfortunate run-in with a dwarf chainsaw fanatic. The sneaky little bugger snuck up behind Kreuger and cut of his legs while he was busy pummelling a Halfling referee into the Astrogranite®, thus ending his career as a blood bowl player and dashing his dreams of ever being a dancer.

For years Kreuger and his coconspirator and accomplice, Wobblespot, travelled the Old World. Kreuger dragged himself about with his massive arms, looking for a new purpose, a new DREAM! That all ended when they were caught in a sudden, freak snow storm in the Blackfire Pass. The Duo ended up stuck in a massive snow drift which eventually broke off the side of the mountain in a massive avalanche which deposited them deep in the glacial crevasse.

There they sat – stuck, frozen in ice, for thousands of years until, literally, the end of the world! When the Old World was drawn into the Realms of Chaos, by Archaon opening up three warp gates, and explodified, Krueger and Wobblespot were cast into the Warp in their giant block of ice and floated through the immaterium for some time (if "time" can actually be thought of as a thing that happens in the warp...?) At some point, the Gods of Chaos could no longer stand the smell and they were kicked back out into Real Space. Then, for further millennia, they passed through nebulae and vast gulfs of entirely empty space. Eventually they ended up in the path of the planet Zonk.

So vast was the block of ice that they were entombed in, when it passed through Zonks atmosphere it only just melted through, depositing Kreuger and Wobblespot on the surface of Zonk at precisely room temperature! They both landed on a gigantic soft mushrooms that miraculously cushioned their fall!

When they eventually awoke,  Kreuger started dragging himself about this new strange world, remembering none of the journey to get there. Upon Zonk they found a community of Orks, which took the two in.



There they met Painboy named Dok McDok, and a Mekboy named Jak Hammurabee.



Together (under Wobblespot’s direction) they crafted Kreuger a set of bionik legs.

(They also fashioned him a pair of Power Klaws: the Klippurs of DOOM!)

It was as if Kreuger had been granted a new lease on life. He had purpose once again! But in the 41st Millenium, there is no Blood Bowl (or Musical Theatre, for that matter), THERE IS ONLY WAR! Kreuger, knew there had to be others that had experienced his loss, and so, together with Wobblespot, Dok McDok, and Jak Hammurabee, they sought out other Orks that had lost their legs and gave them new, mechanical ones so they could return to the Waaaaaagh!



And thus, the legend of Kreuger’s Unvalids were born…




Hotlicks Wobblespot in the 41st millennium.

Despite the Team taking Kreuger's name and Kreuger nominally having the position of "Boss Nob", Wobblespot is the REAL "brains" behind the Unvalids.
I’ve decided to use him as a “counts as” Warboss, as it most closely reflects my vision of him. He obviously isn’t ACTUALLY stronger (S6) and Tougher (T5, W6) than the rest of the Orks, but I see these attributes as an abstraction of his uncanny ability to stay alive (and kill things!) with a clever mix of insane luck and masterful, devious cunning… Normally a Warboss would have a Kustom Shoota, but I’ve just given him a slugga (because I didn’t want to make him TOO over-the-top!)

(Counts as) War Boss with Power Klaw and Slugga.
Commander Level 2
Commander Specialism: Leadership
Skills: Symbol of Courage, Inspiring
95 Points




Uruk Kreuger
Former Ork Blocker of the Gnarly Green Guys, current "leader" of Kreuger’s Unvlids.
I've given the miniature two Power Klaws... because... he just looks more badass that way... but “Counts As” only actually having one – I figured any benefit from having two is pretty much cancelled out by their collective unwieldiness. Technically he’d have a Slugga as well… but the model doesn’t have one and, fluf-wise, he totally couldn’t be bothered… so...
Ork Boy Boss Nob with Klippurs of DOOM (counts as Power Klaw)
Specialism: Leader
Experience: 0
Level: 1
Skills: Resourcefull (+1 Command Point)
15 Points




Gordik Falikill
Gordik Falikill lost all of his legs while learning to fence with his chainsword... against a practice dummy made out of old tires...
Ork Boy with Slugga and Choppa and Stick Bombs
Specialism: Combat
Experience: 0
Level: 1
Skills: Expert Fighter (+1 A)
7 Points




Boomchukka Gurnard
Boomchukka likes his grenades. Unfortunately, in his very first action, against the Adepts Sororitas, Boomchukka hurled a grenade at a squad of sisters, which bounced of one of their pointy boobplates and landed back at his feet. The ensuing explosion tore both legs clear off and launching him straight up in the air. Still... he loves his grenades...
Ork Boy with Slugga and Choppa and lots and lots of Stick Bombs
Specialism: Demolitions
Experience: 0
Level: 1
Skills: Breacher (+1 to wounds roll vs targets that are obscured)
7 Points




Shurty Mcdakka
Shurty McDakka lost his legs in a tragic ping pong accident. It's probably best if we just leave out those details...
Loota with Deffgun and stick bombs
Specialism: Heavy
Experience: 0
Level: 1
Skills: Relentless (ignore – 1 penalty for moving and shooting Heavy Weapon)
12 Points




Rub Furd
Rub Furd lost his legs when they were run over by some bike-riding pinko (Emperor's Children Bikers).
Ork Boy with Slugga and Choppa and Stick Bombs
Experience: 0
Level: 1
Skills: None
7 Points


 

Dik Woodkok
Dik Woodkok lost his legs while whittling a stick... and by "Stick" we mean "Tree"... He hit a knotty bit, and the knife slipped... and by "knife" we mean one of Gordik's Chainswords.
Ork Boy with Slugga and Choppa and Stick Bombs
Experience: 0
Level: 1
Skills: None
7 Points


 

Gaysun Kunny
Gaysun lost his legs in conversion therapy. During his youth, members of Kunny's tribe were concerned he might turning into a Grot, so they put him on a rack to stretch him into a big tall Ork... but they cranked it too tight and his legs popped right off.
Ork Boy with Slugga and Choppa and Stick Bombs
Experience: 0
Level: 1
Skills: None
7 Points




Gurndurk Hoarg
Gurndurk cut his own legs off while shaving. He was using an electric razor. Just... don't even ask...
Ork Boy with Slugga and Choppa and Stick Bombs
Experience: 0
Level: 1
Skills: None
7 Points




Rutter O'Rudely
Rutter loves his sick beats and break dancing. He either wasn't very GOOD at break dancing, though, or, quite possibly, just didn't really understand what break dancing meant and broke his legs right off at a dance battle.
Ork Boy with Shoota and Stick Bombs
Experience: 0
Level: 1
Skills: None
6 Points




Scut Mowr
Scut Mowr lost his legs to a harvesting machine during the invasion of an Imperial Agriworld.
Ork Boy with Shoota and Stick Bombs
Experience: 0
Level: 1
Skills: None
6 Points




Dok McDok
There are stats for Painboyz, but They're commanders with power laws, and none of the commander specialisms really fit.. so I've called Dok McDok a Kommando (which makes him a sneaky git) with a Medic Specialism (not normally a specialism available for orks... like... at all!) and he lost the slugga, just has the choppa.
(as Kommando with Choppa)
Specialism: Medic
Experience: 3
Level: 2
Skills: Reassuring (never counts as shaken when taking Nerve Tests)
Field Medic (roll d6 for models within 3" that receive a wound - on 6, no wound)
12 Points

Jak Hamurabee
Kommando with Slugga and Choppa and Stick Bombs
Experience: 0
Level: 1
Skills: None
8 Points



Some details of their backs...



More details.

Now to actually PLAY some Kill Team!?

All of the Blood Bowl players pictured above are minis I've had for over 30 years - and are probably the largest group of minis I have with their original paint jobs - from that era. I played a LOT of Blood Bowl (2nd Edition) back in the day. So much so, that I'd say it was the best value game - in terms of fun hade per dollar spent - I've ever owned! I had even made custom end zone cards for the Gnarly Green Guys, but it was lost (or destroyed) somewhere along the say.

I have a couple of other (all metal) teams - in addition to the plastic Human and Orks that came in the base game (and the Elves and Dwarves that came in Dungeon Bowl - though I never painted those ones!?). One was a Skeven Team called the Hammertown Tigerrats and a mixed team of Humans, Elves, Dwarves, and Halflings called the Lawful Landsknechts. One of these days, perhaps, I will post pictures of them.

One of the main reasons I've never bought into the new game is I have ALL THIS STUFF from 2nd edition... If I REALLY needed to play, I could play with the stuff I HAVE!

The legs for Kreuger's Unvalids came from Wargames Exclusive. Just as I was finishing these uptake other day, Other Tim stopped by and gave me a bunch of Orks he's never going to use and it included a pile of Burna Boyz! Unfortunately I have no more of the cyborg legs to convert them... I dunno... Do I include some able-bodied Ork Burna Boyz in the Unvalids? Perhaps I'll have to make another order soon!


Coming Soon to Tim's Miniature Wargaming Blog:

There has been talk of getting back to our Blackstone Fortress campaign... might happen this weekend!? (fingers crossed!)